What do we make here?

Fellow Pittsburghers, crisis has been averted. The large glowing orb in the sky that threatened us with good spirits and the capacity to enjoy some time outside has again returned behind the much more familiar shroud of grey clouds. We were at risk of having what some might call "nice weather" but fortunately the rain has returned. I'm sure you almost forgot where you were. I almost did, too.

A friend of mine who lives out in Robinson Township found this a while ago. It's some 54-year-old Pittsburgher's rant about everything he hates about the Pittsburgh area. It may be one of the most negative things I've ever read, and I personally disagree with some aspects of it, but there are other parts of it that make me want to say "H'ayyyyyyymen, brothah! Go an' tell it from the mountain-ah!" Like my favorite line from the whole rant, a rare gem because this fellow doesn't really have much expertise in terms of composition, where he says "Downright mind-numbing DEPRESSION is the only product manufactured [here.]"

And it's true, of course. We're second only to Seattle for rainfall. We fall just behind Buffalo for cloudy days. If you're the kind of person who thrives on sunny days, this is not a great place to be. In fact, this is a mind-numbingly depressing place to be in that regard. But what I really love about this statement is the way it combines this truth with the other shameful truth of the area. Once we were a powerhouse of economic production, but now we're just another shamed rust-belt relic, our population deflated and our factories closed. Pittsburgh is not depressing just because of the weather, but because it's a poignant reminder that our best days are currently behind us, as far as we know. It's a reminder that we live in a country that doesn't make much of anything anymore. It is a monument to the absolute unsustainability of American society. While the mainstream media tells us to be "self-reliant" (after all, anything else is Socialism, don't'cha know?) we live in a country that is the exact opposite of self-reliant. But I digress. (That's right, I used a cliché. Can you handle that?)

I sort of take issue with the author of this rant, though, when he says in effect that the art scene in Pittsburgh is weak at best. It's simply not true... for the scale of our city, we have an unusual profusion of arts organizations. The Mattress Factory for example... There are also tons of theatre organizations, and the Pittsburgh music scene has produced a lot of bands that have gone on to be famous.

I guess what this guy proves in the end is that it's very easy to get and hold a negative impression of our fair city. At first blush it does appear purely terrible. The weather is awful, and if you don't already have friends here, good luck finding something to do. The idea of transportation here is staring at the back of a Buick that's never seen top gear under the able command of someone who should have had his license revoked 10 years ago when he turned 80 and cursing the day you were born. And if you don't have a car, good luck getting anywhere. Like the Pirate's code was to Captain Barbossa, the Port Authority's schedule is more like "guidelines" and you can easily find yourself stranded in a place where you can't walk anywhere you might be able to stay.

But if you dig a bit, there are little pockets of groovitude all around. Especially if you like to eat... And no, I'm not talking about the culinary abomination that is Primanti's... I'm talking about places like Tram's Kitchen (awesome and inexpensive Vietnamese food) or the Silk Elephant or Max's Allegheny Tavern or any of the little Pita carts that hang around Oakland. There are some awesome museums, bike and walking trails everywhere, and the surrounding area has some of the most beautiful scenery in the United States, if I do say so myself, especially in Fall. Look in the City Paper or the Post Gazette (Don't read the Trib... it pollutes your mind. I think it's part of our area's problem, actually.) and you'll find pages of events and activities and things to do.

So that's where I'll leave you now, because that's the sort of thing I'll be talking about in the future. Until next time.

(Oh, yeah, that guy who's the devil, that's Richard Mellon Scaife, owner of the Tribune Review. If you see him, say something nasty to him for me.)